Help Wanted: Grumpy mountain man seeks baby momma. Job is an incubator position only. Surrogate must be impervious to grunting as the form of communication and nosy brotherly neighbors. Rustic mountain range housing available upon request. I wanted...

I might look like a tall, tattooed, bearded Neanderthal... but like an onion, I have layers. Swipe right if you like a proud cat daddy who catches feelings after direct eye contact. All I wanted was a casual plus-one to my brother's destination...